I've recently felt quite 'stuck' with my practice & study. I know I get bogged down & worry about things, even though I'm soo much better than I used to be.
As part of my course I have to do 100 treatments, & I admit I'm not getting on with them as well as I hoped I would be. I guess with all the registering as self-employed & getting into more diagnosis, it feels a bit much currently.
I just feel that I should know more at this stage in my course! I'm always too hard on myself, so I guess I know more than I give myself credit for.
I did half an hour of shiatsu at the week end. No real thoughts about diagnosis, & I didn't write any notes. The idea was just to do some shiatsu. After the time was up, I wasn't that satisfied with how it went, but he enjoyed it.
I guess I'm wondering now how important is it that the client enjoys my shiatsu? They're paying their money & giving up their time to be there, so surely they'd want to enjoy it. Some one reminded me recently that he didn't enjoy really any of his acupuncture sessions, but he kept going as he thought it was worth doing.
As shiatsu is generally more hands on, is it unlikely that the client will not enjoy at least some of it? I think I'd like my practice to be enjoyable for people, but should I be focusing more on balancing any disharmony??
I'm aware that I haven't mentioned aikido in a long, long time.
I couldn't imagine giving up, but I find class very challenging at times. I guess that when I joined the dojo, big changes were afoot for me in my personal life. Some times getting on the mat = big emotion, be it tears or anger. I think they both stem from frustration most of the time.
Sensei is currently revising the syllabus, which means definitely raising the standard by a long way. I admit I found it hard looking at the draft syllabus, as it makes me feel I don't know any thing. (Which I do, I am after all a green belt)
I am pleased with last week's class, as I still managed to be positive even though I didn't exactly feel like it.
Karate didn't seem to affect me this way. I went to class, practised at home etc. but I didn't think about it. The longer I practise aikido, the more I can't seem to get away from it! Which I suppose is the way to be. Practise on the mat affects off the mat, & vice versa.
I definitely do get frustrated with both shiatsu & aikido, but I couldn't imagine giving up either.
Maybe it's all like knitting; it works better when you relax? I've started to learn how to knit, as I don't feel I have any skills to create some thing. I now have a piece of pink wool 7x7 cms, which I'm very proud of :)
Funny how the little things bring happiness.