Sunday, 22 May 2011
I normally pass exams, but it never used to be much fun, what with all the stress and worry I would put myself through. I've been practising aikido since 2004, and started studying shiatsu in 2006. In their own ways they both challenge me and take me out of my comfort zone, which I haven't always found easy.
My life has changed lots since 2004 and I have been working on becoming more positive and having more belief in myself. Generally, I'm smart enough that if I apply myself at some thing, then I'll achieve it. I want to approach challenging things in a more relaxed and positive way, which means I won't procrastinate because I'm scared. I put off graduating in shiatsu because it scared me. I figured I'd have to be some kind of expert, and now that I'm here I realise I'm just ready to begin the next part of my journey.
The week end before the first of my final practicals, I did my Coach Level 1 course for aikido. We all had to teach for 15 minutes on the second day, which is some thing I've never done on the mat. Sure, I've helped other students, but I've never been at the front, let alone teaching a bunch of dan grades with much more experience than me... As the week end approached, by turns I was excited and then pretty nervous. On the day, I bowed to every one, made eye contact and found I was strangely calm. It went well and the hardest thing was trying to position my uke so that every one could see the technique.
This was perfect timing, as my first practical shiatsu exam was on the following Wednesday, and I took that calmness in with me, so that I actually enjoyed it. It felt weird coming home on the train as I'd experienced none of the usual stress. My second practical was the same and I got 92% in my points exam as well. Couldn't stop beaming on the way home. I've passed exams in a subject I care about in a relaxed and positive way, definitely a new experience for me. That's why I've done awesome and it's a big deal for me as it's proof I can do it!